We did it, we have got through the first week of 2021!
I know that sounds rather dramatic but I feel a sense of relief and yet a sense of motivation at the idea that I have got through this week.
In the past, when a new year hit it felt like a new start and I would feel motivated and ready for what the new year was to bring with goals and aspirations ready to go. But this year I did not and have never felt more unlike myself and anxious going into the new year.
These past 7 days have been a real struggle for me as I don't know why but I really thought this year the madness would be over and things would go back to being relatively normal. But they didn't and everything seemed to hit me like a tone of bricks. I am still not able to see my family, go round for tea, playing games and giving them a hug. My job has changed and may not go back for a while. My routine is constantly changing with the christmas break, working from home and last minute changes due to the virus. I felt so unmotivated and just wanted to stay in bed with most evenings crying behind closed doors.
After a pep talk on the phone with my family and my boyfriend being a real rock, I began to feel better towards the end of this week. I feel more like myself and ready to take on the new year. I realised that I had to take a step back, focus on one thing at a time and breathe. There were a few things that got me out of the January blues including a few quotes:
"I know your sad, so I won't tell you to have a good day. Instead I simply advise you to 'have a day.' Stay alive, feed yourself well, wear comfortable clothes and don't give up on yourself just yet. It'll be better soon. Untill then, have a day." - Unkonwn.
From this, I learnt you do not need to be happy and motivated all the time, infact I think it is quite impossible and that is okay. It is okay to not be okay. You don't need to rush into anything and can do things when you are ready.
"Don't forget, you are human. It's okay to have a meltdown. Just don't unpack and live there. Cry it out and refocus on where you are headed." - Hoda Kotb
I hate felling down and negative. Especially infront of other people as I don't want to be a debbie downer and bring everyone down. So, I would bottle it up and I think it all got ontop of me and I cracked. Although at times I didn't know when it would end and felt rubbish that these negative feelings wouldn't go away, it felt good to have a good cry and I did feel better after a few days. I am so lucky I have such an amazing boyfriend who was there to comfort me and my family to reassure me everything was going to be okay.
Now I have had my meltdown, I feel ready to take on the year, one step at a time. With that being said I wanted to share my goals for this year. I have said in the past that I don't put pressure on myself to achieve these and try not to make them too specific as I have found that has worked for me. So, I intend to do that this year too as I set the following goals/aspirations:
- Enjoy every moment - If this year has taught me anything it is this. Embrace every hug, savour every last word and simply enjoy every minute.
- Keep fit - I really enjoyed fitness last year both running and going the gyms when allowed. I feel it did wonders for my mental health too, so I want to keep this going this year. I also have the added and more specific goal within this to run 10 miles.
- Continue to grow my blog - I have absolutely loved my blogging/ instagram platform and everything that has come with it. I have met some amazing people and found a real comfort in it. It has allowed me to be creative, express myself and have fun and I hope this hobby continues to grow.
- Stick to a skin care routine - I have said a few times I want to have a good skincare routine and I always seem to start well then stop. So, I am setting this goal again in the hope that I stick to it. I got a few new skincare bits for christmas and I can't wait to try them!
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